CONTENTS
INTRODUCTION 1 3
I. WAR 17
Like a River of Steel It Flowed, Gray and Ghostlike-Richard Harding Davis
-New York Tribune 18
The Chauffeurs of Madrid-Ernest Hemingway-
New York Times 20
"Peace"-And the Crisis Begins-Dorothy Thompson-New York Herald Tribune 22
Jock Evans Was on Duty That Night-Robert J. Casey-Chicago Daily News 25
Pearl Harbor-Eleanor Roosevelt-United Features Syndicate27
The God-Damned Infantry-Ernie Pyle-Scripps Howard27
The Death of Captain Waskow-Ernie Pyle-Scripps Howard29
D-Day: A Pure Miracle-Ernie Pyle-Scripps Howard31
Dispatches from the End of the War-Orson Welles-New York Post 34
-There Are No Young Guys Here-Pete Hamill-New York Post35
To Root Against Your Country-Art Hoppe-San Francisco Chronicle 38
Obituary for South Vietnam-Peter R. Kann-Wall Street Journal 39
Hallelujah-William F. Buckley Jr.-Universal Press Syndicate 43
Word of the Year: Freedom-William Safire-New York Times 45
Death T akes Hold Among the Living-Pete Hamill-New York Daily News 47
We'll Go Forward From This Moment-Leonard Pitts Jr.-Miami Herald 50
Boots on the Ground, Hearts on Their Sleeves-David Brooks-New York Times 52
A Village Waiting for Rape and Murder-Nicholas D. Kristof-New York Times 53
Farewell to Geronimo-Thomas L. Friedman-New York Times 55
II. POLITICS 57
What's the Matter with Kansas?-William Allen White-Emporia Gazette 58
Good Luck to the Anti-Bolshevists-Theodore Roosevelt-Kansas City Star 60
Gamalielese-H. L. Mencken-Baltimore Sun 62
Scopes Monkey Trial-H. L. Mencken-Baltimore Sun 64
There Is a Ship-Heywood Braun-New York World-Telegram 69
The Mad-Hatter Loyalty Purge-Joseph and Stewart Alsop
-New York Herald Tribune 70
Welch Defends One Friend and Finds He's Made Many-Mary McGrory
-Washington Star 72
The Ninth Life- Murray Kempton-New York Post 74
A Day of Endless Fitness-Mary McGrory-Washington Star 76
Touring Dixie with LBJ-James Reston-New York Times 77
The Decisive Political Center-James Reston-New York Times 79
Are You Against the Handicapped?-William F. Buckley Jr.-Universal Press Syndicate 81
Nixon's Resignation-Charles McDowell-Richmond Times-Dispatch 82
Being Spied On Has Benefits of Sorts-Jack Anderson-Washington Post 85
Reagan Shot: End of an Era?-David S. Broder-Washington Post 87
Slats Mistakes GOP for GOD-Mike Royko-Chicago Tribune 88
The Sound of a Lapdog-George F. Will-Washington Post 90
Supreme Court Buzzword Guide-Michael Kinsley-Washington Post 92
When Clinton Talks, People Listen-and Vice Versa-Molly Ivins
-Fort Worth Star-Telegram 94
No Guardrails-Daniel Henninger-Wall Street Journal 96
Pulp Nonfiction-Maureen Dowd-New York Times 98
Eastern Middle School-Thomas L. Friedman-New York Times 100
Ip Defense of the F-Word-Charles Krauthammer-Washington Post 101
Palin Problem-Kathleen Parker-Washington Post 103
Morning in America-Eugene Robinson-Washington Post 104
National Greatness Agenda-David Brooks-New York Times106
III. SPORTS 109
Casey at the Bat-Ernest Lawrence Thayer-San Francisco Examiner 111
The Four Horsemen-Grantland Rice-New York Herald Tribune112
Louis Knocks Out Schmeling-Bob Considine-International News Service 116
Seabiscuit: The Gamest Thoroughbred-Grantland Rice-New York Tribune 117
"Iron Horse" Breaks-Shirley Povich-Washington Post 119
The Graziano-Zale Fight-Jimmy Cannon-New York Post 121
Death of a Racehorse-W. C. Heinz-New York Sun 123
Miracle of Coogan's Bluff-Red Smith-New York Herald Tribune 125
Fisk's Home Run in 12th Beats Reds-Peter Gammons-Boston Globe 127
Reggie Jackson's Three Homers-Red Smith-New York Times 129
Muhammad Ali-Jack Newfield-Village Voice 131
A Slugger, Right from the First Tee-Jim Murray-Los Angeles Times 135
Webber College: Best Team You Never Saw-Mitch Alborn-Detroit 137
Free Press
Why Is Baseball So Much Better Than Football?-Thomas Boswell 141
-Washington Post
Who Has Won and Who Has Lost?-Bob Greene-Chicago Tribune 148
For Timeless Player, It Was Time-Thomas Boswell-Washington Post 150
Her Blue Haven-Bill Plaschke-Los Angeles Times 152
IV. HUMOR 160
The Danger of Lying in Bed-Mark Twain-The Buffalo Express 162
First Entries in the Devils Dictionary-Ambrose Bierce-The Wasp 164
Reform Administration-Finley Peter Dunne-Chicago Post 165
Congress is Funniest When It's Serious-Will Rogers-New York Times 168
Tips on Horses-Ring Lardner-The New York World 170
Apology-Westbrook Pegler-Scripps Howard 171
Death Pays a Social Call-Damon Runyon-King Features 173
The Vertical Negro Plan-Harry Golden-Carolina Israelite 175
Political Poll in 1776-Art Buchwald-New York Herald Tribune 177
Nixon Goes to the Mountain-Art Buchwald-Washington Post 179
How to Cure a Hangover-Mike Royko-Chicago Daily News 180
Francs and Beans-Russell Baker-New York Times 182
How to Argue Effectively-Dave Barry-The Local Daily News 184
Spring Before Swine-Russell Baker-New York Times 186
How to Keep the IRS from Finding Out You're Lying-Dave Barry
-Miami Herald 187
Pithy into the Wind-Dave Barry-Miami Herald 189
The Hellfire Club-Hunter S. Thompson-San Francisco Examiner 191
You're Never Too Young to Aim High-Carl Hiaasen-Miami Herald 193
I Ate Breakfast and Lived-Lewis Grizzard-Atlanta Journal-Constitution 195
Pardon My French-Tony Kornheiser-Washington Post 196
Why Not the Worst?-Gene Weingarten-Washington Post 198
V. CRIME 214
Chicago Gang War-Ernest Hemingway-The Toronto Star 215
Murder in the Worst Degree-Damon Runyon-International News Service 216
Waiting for Lepke-Walter Winchell-New York Daily Mirror 221
Marvin the Torch-Jimmy Breslin-New York Herald Tribune 224
Breslin to .44 Killer: Give Up Now!-Jimmy Breslin-New York Daily News 226
Head in a Box-Pete Dexter-Philadelphia Daily News 229
A Woman Burned While Police Had Their Danish-Murray Kempton-Newsday 230
Etiquette at a Crime Scene-Carl Hiaasen-Miami Herald 232
Lucy's Blue Light-Steve Lopez-Philadelphia Inquirer 233
Steak Tips to Die For-Mike Barnicle-Baston Globe 235
New Land, Sad Story-Mike Barnicle-Baston Globe 237
A Bullet's lmpact-Mitch Alborn-Detroit Free Press 238
VI. CIVIL RIGHTS & CML LIBERTIES 248
The Destiny of Colored Americans-Fredrick Douglass-North Star 250
To an Anxious Friend-William Allen White-Emporia Gazette 252
A Fine Lesson for the Whole Nation-Heywood Broun
-New York World- Telegram 252
Rebellion in Connecticut-Dorothy Thompson-New York Herald Tribune 254
There Ought to Be a Law-Langston Hughes-Chicago Defender 257
Free Speech Is Worth the Risk-1. F. Stone-!. F. Stone's Journal259
The Wrong Man-Murray Kempton-New York Post 261
Faubus and Little Rock: Scars Are for the Young-Max Lerner-New York Post 263
He Went All the Way-Murray Kempton-New York Post 265
A Flower for the Graves-Eugene Patterson-Atlanta Constitution 267
Marching to Montgomery-Jack Newfield-Village Voice 268
Are the Rioters Racists?-William F. Buckley Jr.-Universal Press Syndicate 273
The Power of One-Anna Quindlen-New York Times 275
Out of the Closet and Open to Legal Attack-Pete Dexter-Sacramento Bee 276
Strangling the NAACP-Carl T. Rowan-Baltimore Sun 278
Coming Out Against Cultural Pollution-Stanley Crouch
-New York Daily News 279
Living Proof of Immigration's Marvelousness-Cynthia Tucker-Atlanta 281
Journal-Constitution
A Path Beyond Grievance-William Raspberry-Washington Post 282
VII. LOCAL VOICES 285
She Bids Farewell to New York-Margaret Fuller-New York Daily Tribune 286
The History of Our Late War-Fanny Fern-New York Ledger 287
Postscripts-0. Henry-Houston Post 288
Don Quixote and His Last Windmill-Ben Hecht-Chicago Daily News 290
About New York-Meyer Berger-New York Times 292
Ah, San Francisco-Herb Caen-San Francisco Examiner 294
Picasso and the Cultural Rebirth of Chicago-Mike Royko-Chicago Sun-Times 296
A not-so-classic Christmas story about a not-so-silent day in Pershing Square
-Jack Smith-Los Angeles Times 298
Lubbock: "Her Teeth Are Stained, But Her Heart Is Pure"-Molly Ivins
-Dallas Times-Herald 300
True Confessions-Steve Lopez-Philadelphia Inquirer 302
Moneylender Jasper Speciale Last of a Different Breed-John L. Smith
-Las vegas Review-Journal 304
A Sprig of Verbena and the Gifts of a Great Teacher-Kathleen Parker
-Washington Post 306
VIII. HARD TIMES 308
The Death of Frankie Jerome-Westbrook Pegler-United News Syndicate 309
Migration Workers Take Lots of Abuse-Woody Guthrie-People's Daily World 310
To First and Last Things-Walter Lippmann-New York Herald Tribune 311
Death in Emergency Room One-Jimmy Breslin-New York Herald Tribune 313
It's an Honor-Jimmy Breslin-New York Herald Tribune 318
Two Minutes to Midnight: The Very Last Hurrah-Pete Hamill-Village Voice 320
On Losing a Friend-John Leonard-New York Times 325
IfYou're Expecting One-Liners-Jim Murray-Los Angeles Times 327
"Are You John Lennon?"-Jimmy Breslin-New York Daily News328
A Short Story About the Vietnam War Memorial-Molly Ivins
-Dallas-Times Herald 330
A Fool's Errand-Bob Herbert-New York Times 332
His Delicious, Mansard-Roofed World-Peggy Noonan-Wall Street Journal 333
Open Letter to America-Chris Rose-New Orleans Times Picayune 340
IX. FAREWELLS 342
Mary White-William Allen White-Emporia Gazette 343
American Mussolini-Westbrook Pegler-Scripps Howard346
Amelia Earhart-Walter Lippmann-New York Herald Tribune348
FOR: A Great Man Passes By-Damon Runyon-New York American 349
Babe Ruth: Game Called-Grantland Rice-North American Newspaper Alliance 352
The Ernest Hemingway I Knew-Jimmy Cannon-New York Post 354
There Was Only One Casey-Wells Twombly- San Francisco Examiner 356
Daley Embodied Chicago-Mike Royko-Chicago Sun-Times359
John Wayne's True Grit-Mike Royko-Chicago Sun-Times361
She Said Goodby with Charm-Jimmy Breslin-New York Daily News 363
King of Cool-Michael Kelly-Washington Post 364
Reagan: An Optimist's Legacy-George F. Will-Washington Post 366
A Mother's Love, Clarified-George F. Will-Washington Post 368
X. THE PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS 370
Advice from Poor Richard's Almanack-Benjamin Franklin 371
Yes, Virginia-There Is a Santa Claus-Francis Pharcellus Church
-New York Sun 374
It's What the Home Folks Think of You That Really Counts-Will Rogers 375
-Tulsa Daily World
Magnificent Mammon-Damon Runyon-New York American377
Myriad-Minded Us-Westbrook Pegler-Scripps Howard378
Even to Judas-Heywood Broun-New York World-Telegram 380
'The Kicks-Murray Kempton-New York Post 381
When God Created Fathers-Erma Bombeck-Dayton Journal Herald 383
When God Created Mothers-Erma Bombeck-Dayton Journal Herald 384
Memories of Leaner Times Fed by Image of Hungry Bum-Pete Dexter 385
-Sacramento Bee
12 DEADLINE ARTISTS
The Days of Gilded Rigatoni-Anna Quindlen-New York Times 386
Jon Will's Aptitudes-George F. Will-Washington Post 388
Advice, Like Youth, Probably Wasted on the Young-Mary Schmich
-Chicago Tribune 390
The Halloween of My Dreams-Marjorie Williams-Washington Post 391
Man of the Streets, in Three Suites-Steve Lopez-Los Angeles Times 393
45 Life Lessons-and Five to Grow On-Regina Brett-Cleveland Plain Dealer 397
To Old Times-Peggy Noonan-Wall Street Journal 399
ABOUT THE COLUMNISTS 403
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS 427
PERMISSIONS 429
ABOUT THE EDITORS 432